


Girl w/ a Droid & a Man-Child in a Mask

by Queen_Yvette



Series: Star Wars [1]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Engineering, Engineers, Eventual Smut, F/M, Force Sensitivity, Force-Sensitive Reader, Inappropriate Use of the Force, Kylo Ren likes you, Loyalty, Medical, Mind Reading, Near Death, Near Death Experiences, Porn With Plot, Robots, Shyness, med bay
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-09
Updated: 2020-04-21
Packaged: 2021-03-02 03:01:26
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,071
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23558005
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Queen_Yvette/pseuds/Queen_Yvette
Summary: You are a girl who's fresh out of college with a degree in engineering and onto the Finalizer. When you get there, you're put to work on the Droid Technician Team (DTT). You spend most of your time upgrading and fixing servant and protocol bots. Lucky for you, you're never bored because a certain man-child in a mask has temper tantrums and tends to take it out on the droids. After a while, you get fed up and finally confront him about it. Things don't go as planned from there.
Relationships: Kylo Ren & Reader, Kylo Ren & You, Kylo Ren/Reader, Kylo Ren/You
Series: Star Wars [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1733938
Comments: 13
Kudos: 54





	1. The Problem Begins

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everyone! This is my first ever Star Wars fic, so I hope you enjoy it!
> 
> Please tell me of any errors, inconsistencies, or things I got wrong! Your help is much appreciated!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You land, meet with the General, travel through a maze of hallways, and get a job, all in a matter of an hour. What a full day for you!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Take a look at the droid photos! It'll help with the story!  
> \/ \/ \/ \/ \/

Droid depictions based on:

Medical Droid(s):

Server Droid(s):

Protocol Droid(s):

You felt the ship jolt and creak as it landed. You looked out the window at the mass of stormtroopers prowling around the docking bay, a sizeable group headed straight for your mode of transportation. You stood up and waited with a mixture of excitement and nervousness at this new chapter in your life. As the gate started to lower, you closed your eyes and took a deep breath. 

"Fresh out of college and I've already got a job." You said to yourself in an unsuccessful attempt to calm your nerves. 

You walked down the ramp and an all silver stormtrooper held out its hand. 

"ID," was all it said. Based on the voice, you guessed it was a woman. 

She waited impatiently as you fumbled through your backpack for your ID. You finally found it sticking out of one of your thick engineering books like a bookmark and gingerly handed it to her.

She skimmed it over and handed it back to you before speaking into a small device.

"General Hux, Sir. The engineer is here."

Through the communicator, you could hear his reply. "Excellent. Bring her to me."

With that, the silver stormtrooper spun a 180 and started walking through the docking bay to a huge set of doors. Her group of followers walked closely behind you as you trailed after her. Whether to protect you or forcefully escort you, you weren't sure. 

When you arrived at a locked door, the silver stormtrooper swiped a gold card and the door opened. You followed her in while her band of groupies waited outside. When she moved aside to stand by the door, you saw a man behind a desk looking at the screen of a computer. The only move he made to acknowledge your presence was a motion to the chair opposing him. You sheepishly sat down and waited in silence for him to speak. After a minute or two, he suddenly jerked his head away from the monitor and moved towards you. You took the opportunity to get a good look at him. He had copper hair and a look of perpetual exhaustion. 

"Good afternoon," he looked down at papers in front of him." As I'm sure you're aware, we sought you out because of your field of study, impressive marks, and high recommendation. You did specialize in droid function and engineering, did you not?" He looked back up at you. 

"I did." You confirmed. 

He looked down at the papers once more. "Good. We only allow the best, and it seems as though you're the one. But bear in mind, there will be punishments for work that's lacking." He looked up at you again, a sudden sense of danger in his eyes.

"Of course, Sir. You need not worry. I love what I do." You assured. 

"In that case, we'll start you off immediately on the Droid Technician Team. You should have fun there." He said with a hint of sarcasm, scrunching his eyebrows and tilting his head at you, a gleam of concern in his eyes.

He returned to his normal serious expression, straightened out the papers, and began tapping away on his keyboard again.

"You'll need a key card." He mumbled into the computer screen. After a few seconds, he got up and took several large strides to a weird printer in the corner of his office. It made a whirring noise, he grabbed something off of a tray, then sat back down.

He handed you a bronze card with your name on it in bold white letters. You turned it over in your hands, examining it. On the back, it had a series of numbers and a bar code. 

"This is a basic key card. The number on the back is your Finalizer ID Code. When scanned, it'll show your information. You can use it to access your lab, your room, the cafeteria, the gym, etc. It will not, however, work for any high-end offices, such as mine," he gave a smug smile. "You'll need permission from someone with a gold card for that."

You gave him a small smile. You felt official and important now that you had a card.

He gave you a bad forced smile and looked behind you. "Captain Phasma, take her to her room, then show her to the DTT work quarters."

"Of course, Sir," came a voice behind you. A hand brushed over your shoulder. "Come."

You got up, pocketed your card, and quickly followed behind her as she left the room and twisted and turned through sleek, pristine corridors. After what felt like walking across the entire ship, _twice_ , she stopped at a small, black door and nodded towards it. You took out your card and swiped the back across a small panel next to the door, watching as it cleanly slid open for you. You slowly walked inside while she waited by the door, all the lights turning on with your movement. In the immediate area was a small kitchen and dining room. To your left was a couch and a tv on a stand. Through an empty doorway to your right was a bedroom, equipped with a full-size bed, a closet, a bedside table with a lamp, and a dresser. Past the couch on your left was a bathroom with basic necessities. You stood in the entrance and took in your new surroundings. The room was bear but cozy. You looked at the opposing wall and realized that through a huge window, the entire room looked out into space.

"Good view." Captain Phasma seemed to read your mind. "Let's go."

You turned and once again, found yourself following her through the hallways to your next destination. You wound through the maze that was the Finalizer until you got to a set of glass double doors with the label " **DROID TECH TEAM** **LAB** ". Without a word, she turned and left you there. 

You studied what was going on inside before you entered. All types of droids were on platforms, in chairs, and sat against walls. Some were whole, while others were in pieces in large bins. Most had gaping holes and long gashes through them. You looked at the gashes curiously. In all your studying, you'd never seen a droid with such an oddly clean cut in it. But, as you entered, you had a feeling you were about to find out why. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well guys, what did you think? Let me know in the comments!
> 
> Follow my Tumblr. for the latest and greatest updates! [Queen_Yvette](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/queen-yvette)  
> Also feel free to join my [discord server!](https://discord.gg/p3cvvNq)
> 
> \-------------  
> I take requests!


	2. Confrontation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You get acquainted with your teammates. And after days of fixing droids that have been abused and cut through, you finally confront the man behind the madness: Kylo Ren

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And now, we get to the interesting part! Also, get ready for some sassy Kylo.

As you walked inside, all repairs stopped and the workers looked at you. Some seemed excited, some rolled their eyes. After a second of uncomfortable silence, a woman came in from a doorway on the right and rather loudly announced her presence.

"What are you all standing around for?! Bots to fix everyone! Let's go!" She clapped twice. 

Everyone jolted out of their trances and continued whatever they were doing. After a moment, the lady started towards you, wiping her brow and effectively smearing grease across her forehead as she did. As she walked over, you looked at her. She had long brown hair pulled back into a high ponytail, bright green eyes, and was lean yet muscular. She wore a black tank top, ripped jeans, black combat boots, and a red flannel tied around her waist. 

"Hey there! You must be the new recruit I've been hearing so much about."

"Yeah, I guess so."

"I'm Alex, leader of our little club here. But you can call me Taz." She held out her hand for you to shake. You hesitantly took it and told her your name.

"Taz?" You questioned, wondering how on Earth she had gotten that nickname.

She laughed and pointed to the crew. "They call me a 'Tasmanian Devil' because I'm so loud and, to be honest, great at breaking stuff. Come on. I'll show you around." She motioned for you to follow her. 

First, she introduced you to everyone. You took mental notes.

  1. Sam: very tall, peacemaker, very logical, been here the longest
  2. Dean: Short brown hair, green eyes, muscular, mischievous
  3. Jade: firetruck red hair, very sassy, always had gum, didn't seem to like you
  4. Bruno: tech wiz, short brown hair that was slicked back, glasses, didn't make eye contact
  5. Martha: dark eyes, missing a hand but doesn't mind talking about it, for that reason is nicknamed "Breezy".
  6. Chelsey: super chipper, bleached hair, Martha's twin sister 
  7. Jaxon: lean, golden curly locks, hazel eyes, very friendly, newest member aside from you



Then, she showed you everything. The room in the back for welding, the bins of spare parts, drawers full of sheets of various metals, wiring, and paints; the break room, the painting corner complete with masks, the droid chargers, and the ports where droids were received and shipped out and the data archives as to who/where they belonged. 

"That should be about everything. Let me know if you have any questions." Taz winked at you. And with that, she went back into the welding room. 

You sat down next to a protocol droid with a clean-cut slash through its head and examined it. The metal had been blackened like the slash had been made by a heat source. The wires inside were also singed, further backing up your heat source theory. You decided to ask Jaxon about it. 

"Oh, yeah. Most of the bots around here have those. They're from a lightsaber," he explained.

"A lightsaber? Who would want to hit a robot with a lightsaber?"

He grimaced. "The Supreme Leader."

Ohhh. You had heard of him a little bit.

"Dude must have anger issues." You mumbled. 

You decided to make yourself useful. You looked around the room for where to start and found a protocol droid that had been abandoned so long it was covered in dust. Weird that nobody had touched it. After a moment of consideration, you shrugged and went to work repairing it. The first thing you had to do was replace the memory card because it had been damaged. You then replaced the wires, the front bulb, and set it down on a table in the welding room. You patched up the gash with a sheet of metal and smoothed it down with a fine grinder. Lastly, you got out several hues of red spray paint and blended the fixed metal with the surrounding coloring. You hooked it up to a charger and went to work on another. 

\------------------------

It had been a week since you'd started on the Droid Tech Team and you'd fixed more bots with lightsaber slashes then you could count. The procedure felt routine at this point. Luckily, you could get twice the work done with your helper droid. The very first protocol droid you fixed had no memories when it woke up and you told it you had fixed it. After that, it wouldn't leave you alone and there was no data as to who or where it belonged in the archives. So you named it Tetrad because of its four colors and accepted your new robo friend. Since he was your helper, you had also fitted him with some tools.

"Ma'am." Tetrad said. "Another shipment of broken droids has arrived."

You didn't look up from your welding work. "How many broken by the Supreme Leader?"

"Six."

You dropped your tools and looked at him. You were _fed up_ with these gashes. Your team was exhausted because of all of the robots this guy was destroying. At _least_ five new ones came in every day. So you decided enough was enough. It was time to confront him.

"Come on Tetrad. We're going for a walk."

"Where to, ma'am?" He inquired. 

"The man-child behind the mask."

You barrelled through the familiar corridors with Tetrad behind you, all the way to the Supreme Leader's quarters. With no gold card, you simply resorted to banging on the door. Your heart thudded in your chest and your stomach twirled into knots as you stood there. When the door opened, it was an understatement to say you were taken by surprise. Out came a tall man with dark, waving shoulder-length hair and a long face. He was surprisingly handsome, compared to the rumors emanating within your team. At this surprise, you stumbled across your words. 

"Uh, Su-Supreme Leader. You need to uh, stop breaking droids. Because I fix them all and it's getting annoying." You put as much force in the words as you could. 

"Is that one?" He asked, pointing at Tetrad.

"Uh, yes." 

He leaned down, uncomfortably close to your face. "And why should I?"

"Well, because I had to replace Tetra- er, the droid's memory chip, so now he doesn't remember what he used to do and has nowhere to go."

"Let's test that, shall we?" He looked at your buddy. "N-9537, report."

Suddenly, Tetrad jolted to attention and stood next to the Supreme Leader.

"Supre-" You started.

"Kylo."

"What?"

"Supreme Leader is too formal to be called by the woman who fixed my droid."

You just stood in shock. What? Tetrad was _his_ protocol droid? 

" _That's_ why nobody touched it," you whispered to yourself. 

Kylo examined the droid's face, brushing his hand against where you had repaired.

"Even painted it over." He mumbled before standing up fully. "N-9537, pull up DTT files."

To Kylo's disgust, Tetrad did nothing. In a blur, he whipped around with his lightsaber spitting fire and stopped it mere inches from your neck. At the same moment, Tetrad whipped out an extra welding mask you had installed on him and thrust it between Kylo's saber and your neck. You froze in horror. You were sure he was going to cut right through the mask and kill you in an instant. But after a second, Kylo shifted and put his weapon away. You clutched your hand to your chest and started heaving. 

"Interesting," was all he said.

You shot up again. "Interesting?! You almost just killed me!"

Kylo ignored you and put his hand up to put Tetrad at ease.

"Made for me, but loyal to you."

"Well, he doesn't remem-"

"I know what you said!" Kylo suddenly spat at you, voice deep and eyes dangerous.

You immediately stepped back, terrified that he would lunge at you again, this time actually killing you. Kylo only cleared his throat after a second.

"Keep him. I have no use for him now."

"Will you at least stop breaking droids?" You asked. 

He side-eyed you and lifted his chin. You took this as his form of a yes. Without another word, he flipped his cloak and disappeared back into his quarters, the door shutting behind him. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 2 down and I like where this is going! Stay tuned for chapter 3 ya'll. It'll have some twists!  
> As always, feel free to tell me what you thought in the comments!  
> 
> 
> Follow my Tumblr. for the latest and greatest updates! [Queen_Yvette](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/queen-yvette)  
> Also feel free to join my [discord server!](https://discord.gg/p3cvvNq)
> 
> \-------------  
> I take requests!


	3. I. Knew. About. You.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After lots of thinking, a heavy request, and a shocking discovery, Kylo summons you. To his personal quarters, in fact.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Buckle up, guys. We goin' for a ride..........on a roller coaster.

In the following days, fewer and fewer droids came in that had been broken by Kylo. He really was trying, you could tell. But the question was why. You were so low on the Finalizer totem pole that you didn't have an official rank. Not to mention, stationed in a team the Commander didn't care about. So why would he listen to you? You had heard so many stories of him doing whatever he wanted just because he could. And nobody could stop him. So why, why oh why, would he listen to you? The one thing you were sure of, was how Tetrad worked. You had deduced that the basic protocol commands were in his programming, but any data and actual memories went away with the broken chip. And saving you, well that was just his choice. 

So many thoughts in your head had you spinning. So you decided to stand at the huge window in your quarters and look out into space. It seemed so simple, so quiet. Distant stars shimmering with elegance and ferocity. And you basked in it. A deep breath of crisp air filled your lungs and you finally felt like you could relax. 

"Beautiful, isn't it," came a voice from your right.

You immediately jumped back, searching the area beside you. The only indicator that someone was there was the gleam of a mask, at least a foot above you.

"Kylo," you breathed.

"Beautiful, isn't it? The darkness." 

"I was actually looking at the stars," you looked back out the window.

From the corner of your vision, you saw him look down at you. You didn't move, but you could feel his eyes searing through your soul, palpable anger radiating off him at your comment. You expected him to blow up, but he remained silent and returned his gaze out into the cosmos. The anger in the silence slowly dwindled until he spoke again.

"I want you to be my personal assistant," came deeply through his vocoder. 

You looked up at him, almost as startled as before. "What? Why?"

"You're smart. Capable. And now that you've taken my droid from me, the position is open."

"But you said..."

"I know I let you have him. And now, I'll have you."

"You say that like it's a fact."

"It is."

This was all too much. You needed to sit down. You walked over to your table and practically fell into one of the chairs. Your mind whirled with anger and confusion and about a million other emotions. You put your head in your hands and just tried to think. And as if Kylo was trying to make that impossible, he slid into the chair opposing you and said something that sounded muffled.

"What," you questioned him.

"I've said nothing."

You groaned and rubbed your forehead with your hands. "I must be going nuts."

But then there it was again. Something very distant and distinctly Kylo. 

You didn't look up. "If you're going to talk, take that thing off. I can't hear you."

You could hear him this time. "Letting you see me the first time was a mistake."

Anger started to boil in you. "Just...just take it off. I can't hear you that well."

He refused again, your blood boiling further. 

"Kylo, just take the stupid thing off!" Your right hand flicked with the sentence. You watched in horror as, with your hand motion, the helmet yanked his head to the side, flying off and clattering across the floor. 

His eyes widened as he looked at you. For the first time, Kylo Ren was speechless.

You glared at your hand. What on Tattoine had just happened?

"No, it couldn't possibly be. Do...do _I_ have The Force?"

In one swift movement, he got up, accidentally tipped over the chair, grabbed his helmet, and stormed out. 

Without thinking, you ran after him. As you did, the sounds of your feet thudding on the floor echo loudly in your ears. Despite that, you could hear clearer than ever. More specifically, you could hear _him_ clearer than ever. You turned a corner and he came into your view. No words came out, but he could hear you too. 

_Kylo stop!_ You thought.

And he froze in his tracks. And then you heard it, but not with your ears. It was more like text in your brain.

_That's why N-9537 protected you._

"What," you asked, confused.

Kylo turned around to look you in the eyes. 

_N-9537 is hardwired to track and protect Force-sensitives._

"No I, I just fixed him. That's all," you defended.

Kylo started towards you, uncomfortably slowly. "And why do you think he hadn't been touched? I gave your team no information as to where he came from. His abandonment couldn't have been purposeful. But, he can only be handled by a Force user."

"Which only I am..." you finished his thought. 

He leaned down to you until he was so close you could smell, almost taste, his cologne. 

"I know you've been curious as to why I've been entertaining your little request," he leaned closer, if that was even possible. And what he said next was so quiet that his breath on your face was harsher than his volume.

"I. Knew. About. You."

He stood upright again, towering about you, eyes unmoving from yours. "7 A.M. My quarters."

With that, he put on his helmet, turned around, and walked briskly away. 

\------------------------

You checked the datapad in your room. 6:50 A.M. Time to go. You stood at your door and stared at it blankly. Today might just be the day that you died. You shook your head, clearing the thought from your mind. It would be fine. You took a deep breath, watched the door open, and off you went to what was most likely your demise.

When you got there, it was obvious Kylo had been waiting for you. The door opened immediately and you noticed that things had been tidied up. You found him inside, sitting at a desk, his head resting on his hands. Trying not to look intimidated, you sat down in the chair opposite him, hyper-aware that his eyes were following you.

"As my assistant, you'll need to hone your abilities with the Force. Training will be every day at 7 A.M." 

_Well he sure wastes no time with formalities._ You thought.

 _One thing you will learn is when you're projecting your thoughts, and when you're not._

"I'm not _trying_ to," your face turned red.

"Your thoughts are very loud," he informed you. 

"Well, then how do I not, do that," you asked.

"Think of something. Then envision a wall in your mind. Set it up to guard your thoughts."

And so you did. You closed your eyes, scrunched your nose, and put up a wall in the front of your mind. You thought of when you were a child and had encountered your first droid. How you were so entranced by how it worked that you decided you wanted to learn.

Then, a feeling so cold that it burned, gripped onto your brain. You tried to hold up the imaginary wall, but the feeling seemed to seep in from everywhere and stung your every nerve. Your senses dulled and you felt the wall crumble. That's when you realized the ringing in your ears was screaming. _Your_ screaming. You felt tears line your cheeks in hot trails. Finally, Kylo pulled back.

Your body rocked from side to side as your eyes opened to look at Kylo. Before you knew what was happening, he was out of his chair and rushing towards you. And then you were falling endlessly, your vision blurring and your ears only hearing distant, incoherent words. You looked up at him with blackness gripping your vision as he dropped to his knees above you. You tried to move, to speak, but you were trapped inside your own mind. Through sheer will power, one last word cascaded from your mouth.

"Help."

You clutched onto him, utterly terrified and searching for anything to anchor you to reality, but you found nothing. And with nothing to ground you, your grip on consciousness slipped. With one last squeeze on his arm, your vision fully darkened and you fell into the black oblivion of unconsciousness. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Saying that the ending was intense would be an understatement!" - My bf  
> I hope you liked it guys! It took literally all day to write, but I have no life, so no biggie. And feel free to give me your thoughts down below! \/ \/ \/  
> Also!!!!! This WILL be a smut fic, as requested. ;) 
> 
> Follow my Tumblr. for the latest and greatest updates! [Queen_Yvette](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/queen-yvette)  
> Also feel free to join my [discord server!](https://discord.gg/p3cvvNq)
> 
> \-------------  
> I take requests!


	4. Secrets Revealed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You wake up in an infirmary, which was weird. How you got there, well that's weird too. To apologize to Kylo, you head back to his quarters. When he insists on doing more training, some things are revealed about the both of you. You then gain the title of a dead girl walking.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here lies: my normal life where I wasn't obsessed with Kylo Ren  
> R.I.P.  
> Also, big shoutout to Lunaxxx for really encouraging me and helping me with writing! Here's chapter 4 for you, girl. ILY.

You violently jolted awake in a room as bright as the sun's reflection on a blanket of snow. You immediately sat up, icy panic coursing through your veins. You slid your legs over the side of whatever you were sitting on and scooted off until your feet hit the cold tile floor. You needed to get the heck out of wherever you were and back to somewhere familiar.

You started to walk away when a warm hand on your back and the smiling face of a nurse brought you down from your panic-high. She had the classic southern accent of a black woman.

"Woah, there honey."

"Where am I," you asked.

"The infirmary. You don't remember a thang, do ya?"

"I...I remember a little. I was doing some sort of training. And then..I don’t know."

"Well honey, you came in here all passed out. I was scared I was gonna have to resuscitate ya. But now it looks like you're just fine. Just sit down while I take your vitals and you'll be good to go."

You begrudgingly sat back down and were still as she checked your blood pressure, heart rate, temperature, among other vitals. Once she was done, you started to look around. 

"How...how did I get here?" 

"You was carried in by the Supreme Leader. Weird, that one, to see him carrying a fragile thing like you. I ain't ever see him be nice to nobody."

"Huh," you looked at her, half in thought. "Am I good to go?"

"You sure are, but be careful. Wouldn't want to take another spill like that."

"Yeah, I will," you assured her. She gave you another smile and walked away. 

The question that remained was what to do next. 

_Where do I even go now?_ _Back to Kylo's quarters? He_ does _deserve an apology, I suppose._ You sighed. Back to the King of Torture it was. 

You jumped down from the gurney and let questions buzz through your head as you walked. You followed the never-ending Finalizer corridors, listening to your footsteps echo in the seemingly abandoned hallways. You watched the reflection of the lights above you pass by as you neared, your image distorted on the floor. Finally, for the third time, you found yourself at the doors of Kylo Ren. Chewing nervously on your lip, you lightly tapped on the cold, menacing metal. It slid open with a whirring noise. As soon as it was open, there he stood, tall and brooding as ever.

Tripping over your thoughts, you spit out the first words that came to you. "You _carried_ me?"

"You're welcome," came crossly from him. 

"Why did you?"

He cocked his head at you. "Would you have preferred that I left you there?"

You looked at your feet. "Well.... _no_." 

He turned to the inside of his quarters and sat down at the desk from your last little excursion. "Then let's continue."

 _Do I really want to do this again?_ You chewed your lip harder. _I_ _s_ _uppose I have no choice._

He watched as you sat down in front of him.

"You're scared."

"Last time didn't go all that well."

"Get into _my_ head, this time," he adjusted himself so he was squarely in front of you. "Feel The Force flow from you to me. Look into your mind's eye."

This whole idea made you uneasy. So much so, that you couldn't manage more than a shy glance at him. 

"Look at me," he said more forcefully. 

You rolled your shoulders, took a deep breath, mentally prepared yourself for whatever was to come, and looked up at him. 

Instantly, your eyes locked with his and your vision narrowed. Everything else might as well have stopped existing. Until that very moment, you had never noticed how beautiful his eyes were. Pools of dark mahogany encompassed by a ring of honey. You wanted to look away, but you were drawn to look.

You tried to mentally push into him, seeing through his body and into his mind. Nothing you have ever done could've prepared you for the moment you broke through.

Inside him, you saw chaos. Everything he'd ever done, his childhood, his thoughts, all hit you at once like a freight train. You saw his mother and father. You saw his training with Luke Skywalker. You felt his betrayal and fear. You felt the equal pull of the dark and the light in him and how forcefully it was tearing him to shreds and eating away at his sanity. But there was something out of place. Something so receded and gentle you almost missed it.

_Longing._

As hard as you had been thrown in, you tumbled out; clutching onto the desk, shaking, and gasping for breath. Your mind whirled and you felt as though you were spinning a thousand miles an hour. And yet, when you looked at him, not so much as a hair had moved. 

You gasped. "Is it like that every time?" 

"Only once or twice, when you're new. You'll learn to block it and find only what's necessary."

You shook your head and looked at him. "You've been through so much."

"And I still have yet to learn about you."

Without so much as a warning, he entered your mind. You saw everything as he did. Your own childhood, your parents, your college friends, your work with the droids, Kylo and his mask that made him impossible to read and all the more threatening, and something you hadn't even realized. How when he looked at you, his eyes set fire to your skin.

The force of him ripping himself from your mind was so jarring you were knocked back into your chair. You looked at him, flushing at the realization that you felt hot under his gaze. And worst of all, he knew it. Before _you_ did! So you did the only thing you could. You got up and ran. You ran out of the room, past the tech lab, through the horridly long corridors and straight to your room. At last, you stumbled into the safety of your private quarters and practically fell onto the floor. 

"What is _wrong_ with you," you scolded yourself. "Get a grip!"

Unable to sink into the floor and simply stop existing, you threaded a hand through your hair and paced the room. 

_I'll obviously have to do some sort of damage control, but how will I ever live this down? He's surely going to kill me the next time we meet. Probably just slice my head clean off. He's made it clear that he should be feared, not..._ lusted _after._ You shuddered at the thought. 

Your stomach dropped as a deep voice came from the other side of your door. 

"I won't kill you. Not unless you give me a better reason to."

"Leave me alone."

"Your thoughts are still loud. You need to be trained to quiet them before it gets you killed. There are other Force-sensitives on this ship."

"Kylo! Leave!"

Blatantly ignoring you, he opened the door. Before it was fully open, you made a break for it to the bathroom and locked the door behind you, leaning against it. You heard him casually cross your living space until he got to you. It was hardly any effort for him to unlock it with the Force and push it open with you on it. 

You gave an exasperated sigh. You were a dead girl walking. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things are getting more serious ya'll! Raise your hand if you think Kylo likes reader too!  
> If you raised your hand, then good. Because this is my fic and I say, bring on the feels.  
> As always, feel free to give me your thoughts down below! I love reading them! \/ \/ \/
> 
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> Also feel free to join my [discord server!](https://discord.gg/p3cvvNq)
> 
> \-------------  
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